Patiently. Waiting. Praying. Anxious. {all over a Penis} PART DEUX

My blonde hair, blue-eyed love with Wii controller in hand shouts,"Hey, Captain Whiny Pants go play with sompin."

This little guy has been let's just say a tad bit on the needy side the past couple of days. Maybe because he knows that tomorrow he is having surgery on his "instrument" {as the Urologist called it}. I have heard it called many things but an instrument. Okay?! Remember this post? Well, tomorrow is surgery day. I have to say I was at total peace with it after we went back last week but now... I am getting a little anxious. {sigh} I know. I know. It will be fine. I know it's a ten minute procedure. I know that he has cut over 300 little penis parts this year {ouch}. BUT... I also know that my sweet baby is little, he doesn't understand why he will have an IV. Why all of these strangers will be around him. Why he will be in a little gown and out of his favorite feety pajamas. One day, I know he will be happy that we did this. One day, he wont look at me with tears as they take him into the surgery room. {sigh} I don't know if I can do this. I have no choice. So, I will do it. I will pray. I will pray and then I will pray some more. and I will tell the doctor if he hurts my sweet baby I will cut his penis off 

So, for tonight and tomorrow I will cling to this verse. "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." 
~ Phillipians 4:6

Patiently. Waiting. Praying. Anxious. {all over a Penis}

{Sigh}


Yes, you heard me right. I can't sleep/I feel uneasy/ I feel anxious/ ... all because of a penis. No, don't worry. I am not pregnant. If I was, I have to be honest would I be devastated? No. Who knows, maybe I will have 4 or 5  sweet little men running around or maybe I will just be thankful, hopefully, joyful and content with the three that I have. Time will tell!


We are on our way to take My Sweet Cole to Children's to meet with a specialist. The last time we were at Children's we had to stay overnight with my sweet angel. He was so sick. I was so frustrated. I didn't want him to stay. I wanted him to be at home with me not in a hospital crib with oxygen on him and a IV sticking out of his little baby arm. The one thing I can't get out of my head is how many sick kids there were. You know, I think we I take it for granted. How often do we actually take time to be thankful for the healthy children we have been so richly blessed with? I know I don't do it enough. 


I remember being so couped up in the room.  I needed to get out. I decided to just walk. I ended up on the floor where all of the precious children who are battling cancer were at. I can remember wanting to curl up in the fetal position and just bawl my eyes out. My heart ached for these sweet children who are so sick. I wanted to make it all better. I wanted to give them something that would make them happy and take away the pain. I wanted them to be able to feel like a kid, if only for a few minutes. I remember feeling so convicted. I prayed and asked the Lord to forgive me for being so selfish. I didn't want to be at the darn hospital. I didn't want MY little boy to be laying in the hospital bed with an IV. Here's the thing, my sweet Cole was going home the next morning. He would be fine. He would be laughing, crawling, walking in no time. However, I bet if I go back up on that same floor today, there will be some of those same sweet angles still fighting that terrible disease. Shame on us  me for not being more thankful.


My smiley little man and his penis will soon meet the Urologist in Cincinnati. I am sure he will be great and my sweet baby will be fine. Nothing major but he will have to have surgery on his penis. {when he gets older he is so going to kill me for writing about this} We still aren't sure what happened. If it was a bad circumcision or if it just didn't heal 100% correct. Anyway to spare you the details he will have to be put under and have his baby penis worked on. Thankfully today we just chat with the surgeon to find out all the details before we schedule his surgery.


{sigh}


Since my dad went to be with Jesus almost a year ago I get very anxious when I go to hospitals. They never bothered me before. I don't know if it's because his death was so unexpected and I spent so much time sitting, waiting, praying, crying, questioning and pleading or if in the back of mind I am scared I will lose someone close to me again. What I do know is this....


"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." 
~ Phillipians 4:6


So today I will keep this verse in the forefront of my mind. As you go about your day I challenge you to do the same. Be thankful for the ones around you, this life is way too short not to love more, dance more, sing more, laugh more and pray more.